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hmm.... It's been quite a long time. Lots of life has happened. I want to want what God wants, and I want to write like CS Lewis. I feel like I've just been going through the motions spiritually, and I want to change that. I hate to think that I've become one of those churchy robots, I want to have a heart that beats savagely for the Kingdom. No more routine, no more. Every twitch, every strain, every sigh, every step, every embrace, every tear, every smile, every breath, let it be for You Lord. Let it be doused in grace. Endure me, teach me how to love you fiercely. Teach me not to let the monster of my selfish emotions take over in certain situations. Give me ears to hear You, and eyes to see You, a nose to smell, hands to touch, and feet to run and feel Your earth beneath me. Here I raise my ebaneser! Hither by Thy help I come. And I hope by Thy good pleasure, safely to arrive at Home! All glory to You on earth and in heaven! amen.